How To Help Your Child Develop Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence comes with several benefits, including higher IQ, better relationships, and enhanced chances of success during adulthood. As a parent, you can play a pivotal role in encouraging your kids to develop their intelligence. Conversely, research suggests that low emotional intelligence can contribute to several problems, making it essential to pay close attention to building emotional intelligence in your little one. The tips below can help you achieve this. 

1. Model the best behavior

An excellent way to help your child develop emotional intelligence is to model the best behavior for them. As the popular saying goes, actions speak louder than words, and the more you model these habits, the more it sticks in your kids’ minds. When the world throws a curveball, show your children how to respond in such situations. Express your feelings, lend a listening ear, and let them know you’re ready to support them to navigate whichever challenges they face, as you’ve likely also experienced it before. Patience and understanding are crucial here. When your little ones see you handling those challenging situations, they’ll pick up a thing or two. 

2. Avoid discouraging labels

Words like “lazy” or “stupid” can negatively impact your children’s self-esteem and emotional intelligence. Instead of focusing on such labels, it’s better to focus on the behaviors instead. If there’s an unpleasant situation, help your child express themselves and understand the reason behind their feelings. Steer clear of negative labels and embrace positive emotional talk. Your child will thank you, and you’ll be setting them up for higher emotional intelligence as they master how to express themselves without fear of being written off. 

3. Praise the efforts and progress

When your little ones put in the work, let them know you see and appreciate it. It doesn’t matter how small those wins may be; words of praise can go a long way. Perhaps your child got a B for an exam they’ve been struggling with or finally getting their first seeds to germinate in the garden. That recognition can do so much for their motivation. Plus, it helps build up their confidence and plants the seed of the growth mindset. It is crucial to focus more on the journey, not just the finish line. 

4. Teach them healthy coping skills

Once your kids understand their feelings, it’s time to equip them with some healthy coping skills. Imagine this: your child knows how to calm down when they’re mad, raise their spirits when they’re down, or tackle their fears head-on. Teaching your kids these specific skills may sound impossible, but you’ll be surprised how quickly they can pick them up. Take, for example, the classic “bubble breaths.” You can simplify this technique by telling them it’s like blowing bubbles in through the nose and out through the mouth. Make dealing with big feelings a bit of an activity. Coach them on helpful coping skills and urge the development of their emotional intelligence. This way, they’ll learn not to instantly react to situations but rather stay calm through it all. 

5. Play games together

Gaming offers several benefits, which are even better when you play them together with your kids. It can be a fun way to boost their emotional IQ. For instance, a cozy game night of card games such as solitaire, can be used to teach life lessons such as how winning and losing are part of the game and part of life in general. So, when your little champ takes the win, you can motivate them by giving them a  high five. And when you lose, do it with grace. Aside from the lessons, emphasize the power of focus and practice for success. If losing stings a bit, let them know that putting in the work can level up their skills. 

6. Activate their problem-solving skills

Problem-solving skills are not just about tackling puzzles but becoming a little problem-solving genius. Imagine your kid having the ability to think outside the box, get creative with solutions, and face challenges head-on. That’s the secret sauce to building a tough child for whatever life throws their way. Skip the routine that strictly follows the rules and explore some out-of-the-box thinking. You may turn this into a game or brainstorm challenge. Aside from flexing their brain muscles, it’s a booster for their confidence and emotional intelligence. 

7. Assist your kid to develop self-awareness

A study by Harvard Business says that internal self-awareness can lead to increased job and relationship satisfaction, social and personal control, and happiness. Self-awareness in kids is all about their emotional smarts, and it begins with getting to know themselves. You can assist your child in becoming self-aware by helping them recognize their feelings, appreciate what makes them tick, and know their strengths and weaknesses. You can make this happen by having a heart-to-heart talk, giving them a space to reflect on their actions, and being an epic listener. You don’t have to be a critic or judgemental. Give them a safe space to spill their emotions, and they’ll become more self-aware. 

8. Make emotional intelligence an ongoing objective

Becoming emotionally intelligent is like a journey. No matter how emotionally intelligent your little one is, there’s always room to level up. Childhood and adolescence are a rollercoaster of emotions, and that’s totally normal. As your kid grows, they’ll face challenges that put their emotional skills to the test. So, make it a mission to keep building those emotional muscles into everyday life. When they’re young, make it a daily goal to talk about feelings. Explore stories, whether it’s from books or movies, and decode those characters’ emotions. Afterward, you can brainstorm better problem-solving actions or strategies those characters could have used. 

9. Demonstrate empathy

When your little ones are having a moment, maybe a dramatic one, it’s so tempting to brush it off. But being dismissive can send the wrong message. Instead, validate those feelings, even if you’re not quite on the same page. For example, your child may want to go to the park even though they haven’t cleaned their room. Instead of shutting it down, try communicating that you understand that they feel a bit bummed when they can’t do what they want to. Let them know those tough moments are common. Doing this shows them you’re in tune with their inner emotions. When they know you get it, the need for a dramatic display might take a backseat. 

To wrap up, boosting your kid’s emotional intelligence is no sprint but a marathon. It’s all about putting in the time, giving them that extra support, and creating a cozy space for your little one to flex their emotional muscles. Remember to keep those conversations flowing and watch their emotional smarts blossom.