Is Mediation or Litigation the Right Divorce Path For You?

Most people marry with the intention of staying together for life. But challenges do arise, making partners want to lead separate lives. About 41% of first marriages, 60% of second marriages, and 73% of third marriages end in divorce.  

At this juncture, you can choose either mediation or litigation. Both are valid options but have different characteristic features. So, how do you choose one over the other? Below is a breakdown of these two divorce options.  

1. Mediation

In mediation, the spouses hire a neutral referee to chair the negotiations. You can get such unbiased third parties from firms offering family law services.  

They guide you in defining mutual goals and discussing possible solutions in a friendly manner. A mediator never imposes verdicts; they simply empower you to formulate solutions that favor the two of you. That’s different from a judge, who makes a binding ruling based on the facts presented.

• Benefits of mediation

Mediation has several advantages. It’s typically more affordable than litigation, keeping your finances in check. Flat-fee packages range from USD$4,000 to USD$5,000, while hourly charges may range from USD$250 to USD500$ per hour. Contrarily, the average divorce cost through litigation is USD$15,000 and USD$20,000.  

Besides costs, mediation gives you and your spouse significant control throughout the process. That sense of empowerment and ownership might be what you need during this difficult transition period.  

Ending your marriage amicably is also helpful. It gives you peace of mind, allows your children to move on with life seamlessly, and helps you sustain beautiful family ties post-divorce.  

• Downsides of mediation

Mediation relies on the willingness of both partners to discuss issues candidly and compromise or agree. If your relationship is hostile, entering into an agreement can be tricky. Furthermore, complex matters like undisclosed assets or multiplex child custody arrangements might not be solved through mediation. Litigation might be a better option in this case. 

2. Litigation

Litigation takes the case to court, where both spouses are represented by lawyers to press for their respective interests. The jury will gather evidence, hear the attorneys’ reasoning, and make a ruling on issues like alimony, child custody, and asset and liability division. It’s a lengthy process, often taking longer than six months to complete.  

• Advantages of litigation

Litigation is more structured. The judges intricately examine various aspects of your divorce before issuing rulings. The outcome may be more favorable, as it’s based on facts and well-established laws.  

Moreover, when the judge delivers judgment, it offers a sense of clarity and closure, especially when you don’t see eye to eye with your spouse. 

• Cons of litigation

As earlier stated, litigation might be very expensive. You must cover court costs, lawyers’ fees, and expert witness costs. Covering these expenses might not be your priority at a time when your financial future isn’t so certain.  

Litigation is more adversarial in nature compared to the friendly manner in which mediation is carried out. This might take an emotional toll on you, possibly worsening the strain you already have in your relationship.  

It’s also not easy going through the divorce process over several months or years. That often means the emotional turmoil drags on for a long time, which can be dangerous to your health. Divorce is ranked the third most stressful life event one can go through. It can lead to chronic depression if not handled well.   

3. Selecting the right path

Deciding between litigation and mediation requires a profound evaluation of several factors, as outlined below: 

• Communication and cooperation: If you can sit down with your spouse, discuss frankly, and find common ground, you may want to consider mediation. But if there’s heightened hostility and bitterness, litigation may be the best option.
• Complexity of issues: Litigation can be more effective in solving complicated issues like child custody disputes, and undisclosed assets. But for simpler cases, mediation works pretty well.
• Emotional capacity: Litigation might be quite stressful because of its combative nature. Choose this route if you’re ready for such emotional challenges. Or go for mediation if you prefer a calmer process.
• Financial situation: Mediation often costs less than litigation. So, evaluate your financial situation and choose accordingly.

In essence, there’s no one-size-fits-all choice. It all boils down to individual situations and preferences.  

Both mediation and litigation are valid paths to divorce. Each has unique advantages and downsides. Knowing these helps you choose the better option depending on your individual situation. Consulting a professional to help you decide on a specific course would be helpful. Ultimately, you’ll successfully end the marriage and start a new life.